"I NEED A HERO" bonnie tyler

Where's the street-wise Hercules to fight the rising odds?

Just so I understand this Gotham City has Batman.

Metropolis has Superman.

And so here in Painesville we have "Senor Painesville" Like Batman he hails from this planet and has no highly sophisticated skills. Relying on only his cunning ways!

No flying skills, no cool Batmobile only a scheduled Laketran bus to move around in.

Blue tights and spandex underwear? Not even a cape!  Does he get his power's from Gatorade?

Now for the important question why can't Painesville's finest capture him, and if they do what do they charge him with?

What will our esteem judge Michael Cicconetti have in store for him

I have been told Senor has been around for quite awhile and as far as anyone knows he hasn't committed a crime.

Seriously is this person mentally ill, off his meds? No one seems to know.

He has stopped people riding speeding bikes, as well as getting down to the over due Library book situation.

Look all I'm saying is lets enjoy our new crusader. After making this post I have to worry if he might hurt someone now.

Yes it would have been nice to have Deadpool the mutant but it is what it is!

 Yes Peyton I understand you were naked mooning a teammate and you just slid off the table and your 'junk' land on top of a female trainers face. It could happen to anyone? What you should be worried about is how Papa Johns and Nationwide view all this?
It seems Peyton has hired Ari Fiescher who took care of Bush 43 to handle this situation?