"DESPERADO" eagles

Lot of mentions  about people work evaluations. Some I can't print here on this site only for the colorful language that some have used.

So knowing how important and revealing  these evaluations are to some of you I decided to print my latest one from my employer concerning me.
Now you must remember my two main superiors I  have a warm relationship with me and I believe they sometimes fudge what the real facts are because of our close and warm work realionship.
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1. Since my last report, this employee has reached rock bottom and continues to dig.
2.  Works well when under constant supervision or cornered like a rat in a trap.
3. This employee is really not much of a has-been, more like a never was.
4. This employee has delusions of adequacy.
5. He sets low personal standards and then consistently fails to meet them.
6 .I believe he has been working with glue too much.
7 .Gates are down, the lights are flashing but no train seems to be coming.
8. Recently caught him in an  arguement with a company signpost.
9.  Got a full 6-pack, but lacks the plastic thingy to hold them all together.
10.Some drink from the fountain of knowledge, he only gargles.
11. He doesn't have ulcers, but he's a carrier.
12.The wheel is turning but the hamster is dead.

Only a dozen there were more. You know what's scary I'm not one of the 47% Mitt seems to talk about.